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I have a confession to make: I’ve never beaten Super Mario Brothers.

I could make it to 8-2 any day; 8-3 if I was lucky. Sadly, I could never find my way through the castle in 8-4 to rescue the Princess from Bowser ::sigh::

I’ve also never finished Super Mario Brothers 2 or Super Mario Brothers 3. Yes, I could get close. But never quite made it to the end.

I never quite finished a Mario game until Super Mario Galaxy was released for Wii. Mission Accomplished!

Apparently I’m not alone in my struggles. Recently, Nintendo announced a new Super Mario Brothers game would be released for Wii, but with a twist.

A new help system has been built into the game. If you get stuck during a level, simply pause the game, and the help system will navigate Mario (Luigi or Toad) through the end of the level. When you think you can handle things on your own, simple jump back in the game and take over.

Now this should sound awesome to me and Alan Skiles the other 3 year olds that haven’t beaten the original Super Mario games. But it’s kinda removing the challenge.

If I beat the game with help, have I really beaten the game? If I beat it without help, is anyone really going to believe me? If your girlfriend gets up to go to the bathroom, you pause the game and let it beat a difficult level, unpause right before your friend gets back, and then proceed to beat the game, aren’t you cheating yourself, cheating at the game, and cheating on your girlfriend?

Okay, that’s a bit figurative, but you get what I’m talking about. I’m not sure how I feel about this. Seems like even Mario has made truth relative.

Here’s some Friday fun for ya! Hey! Down in front!!!