Jack Bauer’s series of bad days is finally over (at least on the TV screen) as Monday night brought us the series finale of 24. In honor of the series, here are Signs You’re Too Addicted to 24:
- You named your first child Tony, but then kicked him out of the house after he turned on Jack
- Despite believing he was a good guy, you hoped Tony would die in Season 1…because of his Cubs mug
- You refuse to acknowledge Obama as the first black president because David Palmer was first
- You know the scene in which the camera guy becomes visible in Season 1
- You still think Victor Drazen is alive
- You believe The Unit was a prequel to 24
- When you hear the word Cougar, you instantly think of Kim Bauer…and the actual cougar that tried to eat her
- You brag that Daniel Dae Kim had to be killed on 24 before he could die on Lost
- You sat in silence for days when you found out Teri Bauer was actually dead
- You found Chloe to be really annoying, then kind of attractive, but then back to really annoying
- When your neighbors ask if you stole their mail, you tell them you want full immunity before you’ll talk
- You think it’s actually possible to travel across Los Angeles during rush hour in 10 minutes
- You were confident Aaron Pierce would show up in the season finale, and kind of letdown when he didn’t
- You were bothered to see Reiko Aylesworth on Lost and shouted, “We had her first!”
- When someone asks you how your day went, you preface your answer by saying “The following events took place between 8:00 AM and 4:00 PM.”
- You believe Nina took down the Pinta and Santa Maria
- You shot a coworker in the knee to find out who ate your yogurt
- You’re still confused how the gay computer analyst became the evil villain on Heroes
- Shock value is no longer in your vocabulary
- You remember Kyle Singer and how his involvement in Season 3 had absolutely NOTHING to do with the show
- You avoid commitment out of fear that every girl you date will end up being a terrorist
- You stopped taking the show seriously when Freddie Prinze Jr. showed up because no one who starts in She’s All That could ever work for CTU
- You got spit on every time Edgar spoke
- You actually know how to pronounce “Rajskub”
- You realized that Jack killed Curtis on Martin Luther King Jr. Day
- You still want to know what happened to Behrooz
- You hate Russia
- You have the CTU ringtone and always answer a call by saying your last name instead of “hello”
- You view torture as a recreational activity
- You find no need to argue if Jack Bauer could defeat Chuck Norris because Bauer already put Chuck in a sleeper hold before you could finish reading this statement
- You blame Silver Spoons for messing up Season 6
- After getting pulled over for speeding, you told the cop “Get me a direct line to the President!”
- You’ve actually uttered the phrase, “Jack Bauer could find Osama bin Laden”
- You saw The Sentinel…and liked it
- You’ve actually considered chopping off your boss’s finger…just in case the locks in the building get replaced with fingerprint entry
- You try to go 24 straight hours without sleeping, eating, or using the bathroom
- You agree with Arizona’s immigration law because every terrorist on 24 is either middle eastern or Russian
- You have a strong desire to only drive Fords and use Sprint phones
- You bought the 24 game for Playstation 2 just to find out what happens between Seasons 2 and 3
Tags: 24, Fox, Jack Bauer
May 26th, 2010 at 3:54 pm
Please tell me the movie is going to be 24 hours long.
May 26th, 2010 at 4:08 pm
You mean there is a CTU ringtone available. Just kidding :) I really wish Palmer was president. I really liked him. These are great.
May 27th, 2010 at 8:45 am
-You write a blog about being addicted to 24 using obscure actor and character names that force readers to consult IMDB and the 24 wiki page multiple times during the process of reading.
May 27th, 2010 at 11:06 am
“- You have a strong desire to only drive Fords and use Sprint phones”
About halfway through the last season, I realized you could easily identify good guys and bad guys by what kind of phone they used. Every bad guy used a Motorola flip phone and every good guy had a Sprint smartphone.
When Chloe set up a wireless hotspot using her Sprint smartphone and immediately started streaming live video from multiple surveillance cameras along with real-time information from CTU to two computers, I realized that they had taken product placement to a whole new level. She even explained that it was “the only secure way to share information.”
June 3rd, 2010 at 4:26 pm
Our dog’s registered name is: “Jack Bauer Junior”. We call him “Bauer”.